Atheism and Relationships
The effect that atheism has on everyday relationships is an unavoidable consequence of our belief, or lack thereof. Relationships within family, with our life partners (I use the term loosely) and their families, and even our friends - although the latter usually seems to be less of an influence in the relationship. How do we deal with being the ''religious black sheep'' in the family? How do we tell our girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands and wives that we will never be able to convert to their religion. In actual fact, the task itself seems easy - the aftermath is where the problem might lie.
The acceptance of atheism from a theist's point of view must be impossible. Christians, for example, are generally bound to a literal duty to convert you, to ''cure'' you. They believe that by doing so they are pleasing their god. To accept you would be akin to letting one of ''god's children'' walk astray, wander from the path of ''good''... Is this the case, really? Is it more of a naturalistic facet of humanity, to try and persuade others to see your point of view, to subscribe to your mindset above their own? I, for one, have never attempted to take a Christian and turn them into an atheist - they're entitled to their own opinion, as we are. All I've ever done is entered a debate, and usually it ends with the theist eventually telling me something along the lines of the following: ''You need Jesus in your life. I can't help you anymore'', or, better yet: ''I'll pray for you. Don't worry.'' These are statements of the infuriating variety - they honestly make my blood boil. I hold my tongue, however, because if I don't it generally transcends the ''debate'' stage and rapidly follows the path of anger that leads to a fist-fight - maybe not so much for women...
There are so many factors triggered by the stigma people attach to atheism to begin with - the common fallacies that atheists are satanists, that they're evil, that there can be no good without a god, etc. The fact of the matter is, atheists are indeed of above average intelligence - by this I do not mean to sound arrogant at all, it merely represents itself as a constant truth in my own experience. This intelligence, and our non-belief, is constantly either misunderstood or met with completely biased judgements - we are judged preceding any encounter we make with another individual that has heard we are atheist, and that judgement is very rarely a good one.
Overcoming this might seem impossible, yet their are couples who have been married for years in atheist/theist relationships. I think it's very possible that they, and their families, have accepted them for more superficial reasons. By that I specifically mean material endowments such as money, or status. Still, true acceptance in such a relationship must exist somewhere.
The acceptance of atheism from a theist's point of view must be impossible. Christians, for example, are generally bound to a literal duty to convert you, to ''cure'' you. They believe that by doing so they are pleasing their god. To accept you would be akin to letting one of ''god's children'' walk astray, wander from the path of ''good''... Is this the case, really? Is it more of a naturalistic facet of humanity, to try and persuade others to see your point of view, to subscribe to your mindset above their own? I, for one, have never attempted to take a Christian and turn them into an atheist - they're entitled to their own opinion, as we are. All I've ever done is entered a debate, and usually it ends with the theist eventually telling me something along the lines of the following: ''You need Jesus in your life. I can't help you anymore'', or, better yet: ''I'll pray for you. Don't worry.'' These are statements of the infuriating variety - they honestly make my blood boil. I hold my tongue, however, because if I don't it generally transcends the ''debate'' stage and rapidly follows the path of anger that leads to a fist-fight - maybe not so much for women...
There are so many factors triggered by the stigma people attach to atheism to begin with - the common fallacies that atheists are satanists, that they're evil, that there can be no good without a god, etc. The fact of the matter is, atheists are indeed of above average intelligence - by this I do not mean to sound arrogant at all, it merely represents itself as a constant truth in my own experience. This intelligence, and our non-belief, is constantly either misunderstood or met with completely biased judgements - we are judged preceding any encounter we make with another individual that has heard we are atheist, and that judgement is very rarely a good one.
Overcoming this might seem impossible, yet their are couples who have been married for years in atheist/theist relationships. I think it's very possible that they, and their families, have accepted them for more superficial reasons. By that I specifically mean material endowments such as money, or status. Still, true acceptance in such a relationship must exist somewhere.
Bearing all the above in mind, have you had an experience similar to this? How has it affected a relationship you have (or, indeed, attempted to have)? If you overcame it, what were your methods in gaining acceptance?
Again, I leave you with your thoughts and a quote - and a few links you may be interested in:
Again, I leave you with your thoughts and a quote - and a few links you may be interested in:
"If we were not afraid of death, I do not believe that the idea of immortality would ever have arisen."
Bertrand Russell - Philosopher - 1872 - 1970
South African Skeptics
http://skeptic.za.org/Free Society Institute
I just told my sister that I'm accepting her for who she is and she should do the same for me... that was 3 years ago, and we're still not talking.
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